I finally have a new book out. Right now it's only in ebook format onAmazon, but more formats, including paperback, will follow. This one was tough to write.

https://www.amazon.com/dp/B0CHPXPVMZ

New book!

 Finally, yes a new book! It's poetry. Yes, there is a novel in the works, but right now there's new poetry. It's digital only right now, but there should be a paperback before long. It's available on Amazon now, but it should be available in other digital stores soon. The title is "This Same Atlantis."

https://tinyurl.com/y23su9r5

The Groundhog

There is a groundhog burrow not too far from my house, close to the a stone wall that separates my property from my neighbor’s. A couple of weeks ago the next door neighbor kids, I assume, sneaked onto my property, took big stones from the stone wall that separates us, and dropped them into the groundhog burrow. I found it the next morning and removed all the stones to give the groundhog access again. I thought the groundhog might never go back but a few days ago I was in my garden and saw the groundhog going to the burrow. I said hello to him and he looked back at me. And then this morning, as I was having coffee, I heard something at the glass door. I looked over and saw Ollie Cat sitting inside, right up to the glass. On the other side of the glass was the groundhog, tapping at the glass. Ollie just stared. I went up to the glass and looked. The groundhog looked back and then ran off. I may have a new friend.

Now What

I guess it’s obvious that I’m not much of a blogger. I tend to forget for weeks (er, months) at a time that I even have a blog.  It’s been worse recently because of some serious family health issues, both human and feline. And yes, my cats are family. 

Things are a little bit more under control now so I thought I’d do a blog post. This is it. The main thing I wanted to say is that yes, I’m still here. I’m still writing and I hope to have something out before too long. Fingers crosesd (it’s hard to tyep with fingers crosesd.)

What's Up

A few people have asked me what I’m up to these days. I know I’m supposed to share amusing and interesting posts here, mostly about my writing. People also tell me to promote my work and do it regularly. It’s supposed to be easy. The truth is that none of this is easy, at least not for me.  I’ve recently started a rather difficult project. Maybe eventually I can find something amusing about it to pass along. If I can make some progress and see daylight and not get lost in the woods, I’ll do that, so don’t send out the search parties yet.   Fingers crossed. 

As for self-promotion, I’ve always been dreadful at it. This is about the best I can do:

amazon url (there’s more than one page here): 

https://tinyurl.com/y2nmeda5

barnes and noble:

https://tinyurl.com/yyancveu

apple books: some of my books are also available here; I think you need to type Noel-Anne Brennan into the search bar after you sign in

but wait, there's more!

Not Out of the Woods is now available on Barnes and Noble and also Apple Books. And they tell me the paperback will be out pretty much any minute now. This should give you a choice of links to the online stores:
books2read.com/u/47zqXa

New Book Out

I have a new book out! Before anyone gets too excited, it's poetry and right now it's on Amazon for kindle only. But it will be available on other ebook outlets soon, and it should be out in paperback in maybe a week. Check it out!

https://www.amazon.com/dp/B07R8FKW6T/ref=cm_sw_em_r_mt_dp_U_y3iXCbM458GC3

An Update

In answer to a question, yes, I am still writing. It has not been going well. In large part that’s because I’m still not over the death of my daughter. People say I should not let that paralyze me me and it’s not, but it certainly has been slowing me down and making work very difficult. I’m not giving up, though.  I know people want fiction and I still want to deliver it. I plan on delivering it but something may come first. That something is a poetry book. I know, I know, it’s not the same thing as fiction but poetry can be not only beautiful and emotionally touching but intellectually accessible as well. At least, so they say, and that's my experience. And poetry can be fun. I’ve been told mine can be. So the poetry will probably come first and then the fiction.  Soon, I hope. Stay tuned.

My New “Job”

This summer I have had a very demanding new part-time job. It wasn’t one I wanted but there’s no turning it down. The job is going to doctors.  My husband’s been sick, I’ve been sick, even the cats. Illness and injury and “conditions.” One thing after another. I just got back from a bunch of x-rays today, never mind what happened. Not my idea of a good time. I figured it was because I’m “getting older” but I’ve heard from people much younger that they have been going through similar things. Stuff happens, so they say. Doctors, doctors, and more doctors. What would we do without ‘em? But those appointments can sure be a time vortex.

What has all of this meant for my writing? Well, let’s say it hasn’t been good. Progress has been slow and unsteady. As someone recently told me, though, “Stop making excuses.” Well, we’re not talking excuses here but I know what she meant. I intend to do better.  I plan on getting to work as soon as I get back from the vet where I’m taking a cat for her rabies booster.

Just Do It

This past year since my daughter died has been very difficult for me. I haven’t been able to work, or at least, I haven’t been able to write. I finally pulled myself sufficiently together to get a new book of poetry in order, “The Seasons of Forever,” a book I’m dedicating to Anne’s memory. It’s published and available now. It’s not  yet in paper, only in digital editions, but you can pick your preferred seller and e-book format from here: https://www.books2read.com/u/bWZq90  

So I have a book of poetry for Anne.  It’s a start. I still have a problem with fiction, though. I’ve been thinking about this, since the next installment of the Tiger Lily series is seriously overdue. I have significant plot changes to make, among other things. I was stewing about this as I lay in bed last night trying to sleep. I kept thinking about Anne, the new book, and then Anne again. I finally did fall asleep but apparently my subconscious was not ready to let go of the problem. I snapped awake from a doze, hearing Anne’s voice. She had that slightly exasperated tone that adult children (and yes, teens, which is where I think they perfect it) can use with their parents. “Mom! Just do it, Mom!” I’m going to try to take that advice.

It Took Long Enough

My book of poetry, "Welcome to Wilderness: poems" came out in e-format in 2015 on Amazon and iBooks.  I have been wanting it out in paperback ever since. Finally, I got it. If you want to look at it, both formats are available on Amazon: http://a.co/4AhQHo9. The paperback should be available through most bookstores, although you will probably have to ask them to order it (hey, it is poetry 😀). I'm not sure that it's always true that "good things come to those who wait," but sometimes some stuff comes!

I Will Never Get Over It

People gave me what they thought was good advice: to give myself time to grieve and to get over the death of my only child. I am never going to get over Anne’s death. I realize that now.  I understand why people said it and I appreciate the impulse they had to be sympathetic and helpful. I tried to get over it but, well, just no. It won’t happen. I will never stop missing her. I will never stop second-guessing and wondering ”what if.” I’ve accepted that fact. But I also realize that I need to do things other than mourn. 

Specifically, I need to get back to writing. I’m not sure why that’s been so hard. Friends seem to think that getting back to work will be good for me. They could be right. I do know that at some point I have to start writing again, so perhaps that point should be now. So here goes. I won’t get over it but maybe I can get on with it.

My Worst Day Ever

It was my worst day ever and I am still living it. It began at 3:00 AM on May 18 with a call from a hospital. My daughter was in the ICU. She had called 911 and gone out to wait on her apartment steps for the ambulance but when they arrived she was unconscious. Her heart stopped and it took them forty-five minutes to restart it.  She never regained consciousness. 

What happened was cardiac arrest, caused, I think, by a pulmonary embolism. Yes, she smoked. She told us she had stopped but I guess kids of whatever age always lie to their parents about some things. (Except, of course, I never did. Right.) The clinical details are important but not the most important thing. Life is short, yes, but it wasn’t supposed to be that short. Children are “not supposed” to die before their parents. I lost my beloved child and the world lost a creative and caring and funny soul.

I tried to talk to her in the hospital. She was unconscious and in massive organ failure but I tried. I tried to feel her spirit nearby but that failed, too. We were in the room with her when she died. Since then I’ve been hollow. I do a fair job of pretending to be human, or at least I think I’m doing a fair job. That my daughter was an adult and living on her own does not make her loss any easier to bear. Some people seem to think so, and it is simpler to hide the grief and the guilt. Yes, guilt. Parents always, apparently, think there were things they could have done to alter events. Some things never change.

My own life seems to have stopped. I am doing things that need to be done after a death: funeral home, lawyer, cleaning out her apartment, writing her obituary, adopting her three cats. Since we already had two cats we now have five. Yikes. 

I know I need to get back to work. I woke up the other day with her voice in my head saying, “Mom. Just write the book, Mom.”  I’d like to but so far I just can’t. What I want to do is call her up and make outrageous puns with her. Maybe she could give me a call some early morning in my dreams and we could goof around.

Wait. I forgot Goodreads?

Someone recently told me she had read “A Changed World” and enjoyed it. She said there was a really nice review of it on Goodreads, which is how she found it. Goodreads. Hmm. I have an account on Goodreads but I have been remiss about doing anything with it, anything at all. Had I been missing something? I went over there to look.  

I have been missing a lot, apparently. There is all sorts of stuff happening there, so much that I almost ran away again, overwhelmed. But I didn’t. I decided to get my feet wet slowly and find books that I might want to read. That wasn’t hard to do and I have lists now. And yes, I did check out the reviews of “A Changed World.” There’s a really nice one. Now back to making lists of books I want to read. Oh wait, here are links to stores with “A Changed World”: https://www.books2read.com/u/3Lrp2M

Springtime Silliness

Sometimes it's not about anything profound or even anything useful. More often than not  what runs through my head is not useful. Silliness can be fun, though, and I think Spring brings that out in people. So as a poet  I thought I would share this in-depth version of a classic Spring poem:

It’s Spring, it’s Spring,

The bird is on the wing!

Somehow that seems absurd.

I think that it should rather be

The wing is on the bird.

More availability

"Out of Stillness" is now available at Barnes and Noble, too. It's accessible through the same mega-link that works for all the stores: https://www.books2read.com/u/3LrBjD  You just click and pick. I'm not sure what took Barnes and Noble so long but the good news is, the book is there!

It's Ready!

"Out of Stillness" is available now at several online bookstores. They are all accessible through this one link, which can take you to the store of your choice: https://www.books2read.com/u/3LrBjD. The link includes includes access to Amazon and ibooks and a couple of others.  It should be available soon at Barnes and Noble, too. I'll post that link when I get it.

As Promised!

As I promised, here comes the new poetry book, "Out Of Stillness." It should be available very soon. I wanted to show off the cover  in advance; I really like it! I'll let you know when it's up and running!

Good Intentions

I’m supposed to post this blog regularly, whatever that means. Or that’s what I tell myself. As you can see, I don’t. I still have good intentions but we all know what’s paved with those.  I have good intentions despite still dealing with illness, both my own and family’s, and all the usual stuff. (“Stuff” includes interesting endeavors such as repairing my own plumbing .) So now what?

I have decided to give my good intentions half a chance and act on them. I’m back to work writing, although at a somewhat reduced rate for the moment. I do have another book of poetry that’s almost ready, which could perhaps be considered a sign of good faith. It will be cool! Stay tuned. Oh, and a belated Happy New Year.

You never know what might happen in a bookstore

On Christmas Eve I was in my local bookstore, buying a book for my husband. The place was jammed. This made me happy, as not everyone was buying calendars; there were plenty of people lining up to pay for actual books. I wandered around as best I could through the crush of people, enjoying the feeding frenzy. I found myself in the science fiction section, unsurprisingly. When the other customers briefly cleared away, I realized that right in front of me were a couple of books by an author whose name I recognized: Noel-Anne Brennan. For no good reason I pulled out a copy of “Tiger Lily”.  Yup, it was definitely my book, and I started to push it back.

“Oh!” said the young woman beside me. “That’s a good book! You should read it!”

I blinked in surprise and stared after her. I suspect my mouth was hanging open.  She had already moved on, disappearing into the crush of people. You never know what might happen in a bookstore.